2004 TV Superlatives

Best Commercial: Hewlett Packard “Picture Book” – With the “how’d they do that” special effects that literally captured life in a picture (and vice versa) and a catchy Kinks tune, this ad was the perfect eye catching treat.

Worst Commercial: Old Navy – The strategy behind advertising at Old Navy must be that any talk about their company is good. So they come up with some of the most irritating campaigns in recent memory and buy ad space as much as they possibly can. This holiday season they came up with stalker like carolers (none of whom could sing) who reminded people of sales. For some reason, they always gave a solo to the most off-key singers.

STFU Award: Star Jones – I don’t even watch The View and I'm sick of this woman giving Bridezillas a bad name. It’s like she thinks people think that she couldn’t find anyone so finding this schmo is like vindication and she can gloat.

It’s Not Funny Anymore: William Hung – It was pretty funny to see this guy butcher a terrible song the first time, but like last year’s “Is this Chicken or tuna” sound byte, it got old real fast. When you break in January and you’re a has been by May, it’s not a good thing.

Worst Use of Overshadowing: Janet Jackson – Sports fans actually remember an amazing Super Bowl, but thanks to her publicity stunt, most of America remembers that split second shot of a nipple, which made nearly everyone overreact.

Best Network Decision: Fox for renewing Arrested Development – It was a questionable year for fans of one of the few sitcoms not overusing the “set up-punch line-tag” formula. The only sitcom that matters got a second season renewal, which made a tough season filled with many formulaic shows and too many potentially great shows getting axed far too soon.

Worst Network Decision: WB for canceling Angel – Did we ever get a reason that made an ounce of sense to anyone? Especially since without Joss Whedon WB would be known still as the network that takes the crap Fox cancels. One of WB’s biggest hits gets killed just as it gained a new wind. While the final episodes were for the most part great, there was still at least one more season in them. The chaos following the insurrection, the full potential of Illyria and the reunion between Buffy, Angel and Spike will remain among the “What ifs” of TV history. At least we can hope for a movie.

Thank you for putting this on DVD award: Freaks and Geeks - This brilliant, but quickly canceled show made a comeback on a 6 disc set (with a special edition) that was the ultimate treat for fans jonesing for the Weirs and their friends.

Best Proof that Award Shows May Have Some Relevance: Arrested Development wins Best Comedy Series at the Emmys - Sometimes they do get it right. Now if only they could give Joss Whedon his weight in statues.

Best Proof that Award Shows Have No Relevance: The Emmys for disqualifying The Office for producing too few episodes – And yet they gave West Wing more nominations than they’ve deserved in years. Not even an honorary award for such a brilliant work.

Most boring awards moment: Lord of the Rings wins, again, and again, and again… - While the Peter Jackson helmed trilogy was truly one of the best in cinematic history, this 4 hour celebration of it was bloated and boring in its predictability and self service.

Worst TV Personality: Paris Hilton – Come back when you have some type of talent. Anything, and being sleazy isn’t a talent.

Best Celebrity Sibling: Charlie Murphy – The brother of Eddie helped provide the back story of what would become Dave Chappelle’s signature sketch.

Worst Celebrity Sibling: Ashlee Simpson – Riding in on her sister’s coattails, shifting the blame for her lip synching fiasco and becoming another celebrity who thinks a reality show is a good idea.

Most in Danger of Becoming Overexposed: Jon Stewart – Maybe it was in part of it being an election year, but Jon Stewart was everywhere this year. Being the host of one of the smartest satires (along with South Park) on TV certainly helped, but this hype risks becoming too much to live up to.

Worst Case for an Argument: Tucker Carlson of Crossfire interviewing Jon Stewart. "You're on CNN, the show that leads into mine is puppets making prank phone calls. What is wrong with you?" -Stewart to Carlson, whose Crossfire was canceled a few months later.

The Top 40 Episodes of 2004, 10-1

#10. South Park “Douche and Turd” (Original Airdate: October 27, 2004) – After eight years and well over a hundred episodes, it would seem logical that South Park’s satirical and envelope-pushing edge would’ve diminished. I am glad I'm wrong. A dead on parody of groups that encouraged voting, but who really only wanted more votes for the candidate they supported, PETA, and picking out between two undesirable candidates, both of whom had adamant supporters, South Park is the sharpest satire on TV. Highlight: P Diddy’s “Vote or Die” rap.

#9. Nip/Tuck “Sean McNamara” (Original Airdate: September 28, 2004) – A chilling return of serial rapist, who attacks Sean in his shower warning him not to fix any more of his victims, marked the penultimate episode of this amazing second season. Another return, of Christian’s bitter (and now HIV positive) ex-lover Gina (the terrific Jessalyn Gilsig) was a wake up call to the ladies man. While he turned out negative, him laying in her hospital bed in the end was an incredibly touching moment.

#7-8. Lost “Pilot” (Original Airdates: September 22 and 29, 2004) – A plane crash on a deserted and mysterious island was all it took to wake up scripted network TV, suffocating under a pile of sensationalist reality TV, and the ABC network. No one a year ago would’ve put “break out hit” and “ABC” in the same sentence before Lost came along. A man was sucked into a jet engine, and it was love.

#6. 24 “Day 3: 6:00 AM – 7:00 AM” (Original Airdate: April 18, 2004) – Unfortunately postponed, it’s a shame that some of 24’s fans missed this episode due to a shift schedule change. Chappelle’s final hour was the one where we finally saw his humanity. Underneath the stuffy exterior of CTU’s boss lay a sad, lonely man who wound up on a terrorist’s list. The last few minutes are incredibly intense and difficult to watch, but from beginning to the silent ticking clock at the end it is a knock out.

#4-5. Angel “A Hole in the World” and “Shells” (Original Airdates: February 25, 2004 and March 3, 2004) – Shortly after the cancellation of Angel was announced, fans had their hearts ripped out of their chests again courtesy of series co-creator and master heartbreaker Joss Whedon. Amy Acker delivers one of the best performances of the year as sweet, beautiful Fred fades away when the ancient demon ruler Illyria takes control of her body. Her death and the aftermath were certainly Angel’s answer to its sister show Buffy’s “The Body” in dealing with how we deal with the loss of someone we love and how sometimes people die for nothing.

#3. The Office “Christmas Special” (Original US Airdate: October 23, 2004) – Yes, technically this shouldn’t be included because it didn’t originally air in 2004, but since it didn’t premiere in the US until this year, it is included. For a show that broke so many conventions and could be awfully painful to watch (in a good way), one of the funniest shows I've ever seen went out with a happy ending that was quite conventional, but it was believable and moving. It was a special event where you could laugh hysterically, cry and cheer and it all worked.

#2. The Sopranos “Long Term Parking” (Original Airdate: May 23, 2004) – Tony Soprano and his gang of thugs are the ultimate anti-heroes. And David Chase loves to remind the viewer of the brutal nature and the true evil within their souls. This resulted in the tragic loss of Adrianna, played to perfection (and earning a well deserved Emmy) by the beautiful Drea de Matteo. We were crushed as we saw Adrianna’s dream of getting away from these awful men give way to the reality of her being driven to her own execution, having been tricked by her fiancé Christopher and Tony after Chris discovered that she’s been talking to the feds. Her worry as her case came to a head was so palpable, and made for one of the most shocking and exhausting hours of TV in 2004.

But before we go to number one, let's see my choice for the worst episode of the year:

Six Feet Under “That’s My Dog” (Original Airdate: July 18, 2004) – They probably had the best intentions when they made this episode. They were hoping that this episode would be the episode that would make them a shoe in for every applicable Emmy and fans would be enthusiastically talking about it the next day. They were talking, but it was more to the effect of "I am never watching Six Feet Under ever again" or "If they ever pull that again I will hunt them down and kill them." This is the episode that killed Six Feet Under. Millions tuned out after David’s 25-minute (uninterrupted) kidnapping, essentially to show that David’s doormat qualities go to absurd lengths. After absurd and sadistic plot twists people screamed “Enough already.” Some found it harrowing, most thought it was nauseating. With a story that would make Kim Bauer from 24 say “Man, you’re stupid,” “Dog” was a turkey and the rest of the season couldn’t recover from a massive blow like that.

And now, the number one episode of the year
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
#1. Angel “Not Fade Away” (Original Airdate: May 19, 2004) – 2004 had a few very high profile exits. Sex and the City, Friends and Frasier both went off with huge numbers. But another exit, one that came out of the blue and still confuses fans, was the cancellation of cult hit Angel. Fans were outraged, but few could complain about how the show went out. They didn’t spend the hour hugging and crying like most series finales. They preferred to go out in a blaze of glory. With the Circle of the Black Thorn being taken out one by one (a perfect way for Joss to vent his frustration at myopic WB executives), Angel did about as good a tribute to the baptism scene from The Godfather as possible. A shocking ending that helped nail the theme of the ongoing fight against evil, Angel took his final bow with class.

2004 was a great year for TV. Hopefully 2005 will be even better. I'll keep you posted about what moves me, disgusts me, makes me laugh and every other reaction I could have about TV. Until then, the remote is yours.

The Top 40 Episodes of 2004, 20-11

#20. Chappelle’s Show “Episode 204” (Original Airdate: February 11, 2004) – This is the episode that skyrocketed Dave Chappelle from a mere cult comic hit into a breakout smash. Charlie Murphy, brother of Eddie, recalls stories of instances when he had to fight pop star Rick James. The 80s spoof created a catchphrase used in frat houses throughout the country.

#19. South Park “The Passion of the Jew” (Original Airdate: March 31, 2004) – Another dose of Matt Stone and Trey Parker’s merciless eye for hilarious satire, an insane Mel Gibson screaming “Qapla” and defecating on Cartman, who started his own Nazi society subtly disguised a fan club for The Passion.

#18. Rescue Me “Guts” (Original Airdate: July 21, 2004) – A show which helped FX become a triple threat with 3 critically acclaimed highly rated shows, the commercial free premiere helped set the stage for an interesting story of NYC fire fighters dealing with everyday life after the 9/11 sympathy died down, even if the memories are still there.

#17. Arrested Development “The One Where They Build a House” (Original Airdate: November 14, 2004) Simply brilliant, from the call backs to season 1, Tobias’ using his Blue Man Group make up to hide from Lindsey and the “Mission Accomplished” banner. It is episodes like this one that shows that this is the only sitcom that matters.

#16. The Sopranos “All Due Respect” (Original Airdate: June 6, 2004) – A fine way to wrap up the season, with an interesting twist involving Soprano’s rival Johnny Sack getting arrested in a surprise raid. Also, while Tony’s murder of his cousin is despicable, we can understand why, which is one of the reasons why the episode worked. And working in Van Morrison’s “Glad Tidings” 3 times is always a plus.

#15. Lost “Raised by Another” (Original Airdate: December 1, 2004) – As if this show didn’t pose enough questions, the shockers in this episode (the psychic knew about the crash. Claire’s baby is of significant importance. Ethan wasn’t on the plane!) were some of the best ones to stay awake speculating about. William Mapother (Tom Cruise’s cousin) as Ethan couldn’t be any creepier, especially with that evil blank stare.

#14. Desperate Housewives “Guilty” (Original Airdate: November 28, 2004) – Things came to a head and we got some juicy details regarding the mystery behind Mary Alice’s suicide. It wasn’t a big surprise to know that the neighborhood’s Gladys Kravitz Mrs. Huber was the one behind the vague note, but her attack (by the blender she stole from Mary Alice, ironically) and murder at the hands of Mary Alice’s widower, super creepy Paul, was a major turning point for the show.

#13. Chappelle’s Show “Episode 212” (Original Airdate: April 7, 2004) – Best sport of the year goes to Wayne Brady, who threw away his “Goody Two Shoes” persona for a drive by shooting, hooker threatening, cop killing psychopath, taking Dave along from the ride. “They canceled my show, and s--- goes crazy” and “Is Wayne Brady gonna have to chock a b----?” are two highlights.

#12. 24 “Day 3: 4:00 AM – 5:00 AM” (Original Airdate: March 30, 2004) – After a 5 week hiatus, 24 came back with guns blazing. Ready to atone for an uneven season, 4-5 AM provided a great vehicle for Reiko Aylesworth as Michelle Dessler, CTU agent trying to prevent a major panic in a hotel where a deadly virus has been unleashed as people are starting to wake up. This is 24 at its best. It’s amazing how we were riveted by one of our worst post-9/11 nightmares.

#11. Arrested Development “Pier Pressure” (Original Airdate: January 11, 2004) – This delightfully twisted spin on the “teach the son a lesson” formula had strippers, medicinal marijuana and a one armed man. Something for everyone.

Tomorrow: The top 10! 2 series finales, 1 series premiere, the virtues of voting via gangsta rap, the worst episode of the year and the number one episode of the year! Until then, the remote is yours.

The Top 40 Episodes of 2004, 30-21

#30. Arrested Development “Let Them Eat Cake” (Original Airdate: June 6, 2004) – The finale of this show’s amazing first season finally gave fans the payoff they hinted at all season, and paved the way for season two.

#29. Lost “Walkabout” (Original Airdate: October 13, 2004) – Chronicling the backstory of Lost’s most mysterious castaway, it becomes clear how this loser in life found his place upon crashing on the island. And the twist at the end continued the Lost train’s momentum.

#28. Desperate Housewives “Pilot” (Original Airdate: October 3, 2004) The 1, 2 punch of ABC’s hit parade struck that Sunday. An interesting blend of soap, comedy and mystery, America was hooked at first glance, giving fans of interesting scripted TV hope.

#27. South Park “Woodland Critter Christmas” (Original Airdate: December 15, 2004) – For a show that has done holiday specials about Santa being a prisoner in an Iraqi prison, talking feces and Charlie Manson discovering the spirit of Christmas, this, a holiday special involving Satanic critters hoping to give birth the anti-Christ (all the product of Cartman’s imagination) is the most messed up Christmas special yet.

#26. The Amazing Race “You’ve Just Made Me a Millionaire” (Original Airdate: September 21, 2004) – One of the class acts of the reality genre, the finale, where favorites Chip and Kim took home the prize over Christie and the villainous Colin, was an edge of your seat suspenseful ride until the very end.

#25. Alias “Hourglass” (Original Airdate: April 18, 2004) – In a season bogged down by a deadly dull character and the lack of several interesting ones, Alias was able to get it together for this one episode with an interesting turn of events that focused on character and the “death” and resurrection of Sloane and what use he would be to Jack, who revived him.

#24. Nip/Tuck “Joan Rivers” (Original Airdate: October 5, 2004) – A great way to end the season, with one of the biggest shockers and cliffhangers of the year. Ava’s a man! Stunt casting (Alec Baldwin, Famke Janssen and the titular Rivers) that works! The Carver’s at Christian’s house (and the music was a perfect match)! Oh the wait has been rough.

#23. Lost “All the Best Cowboys Have Daddy Issues” (Original Airdate: December 8, 2004) Lost finished out the year with on a stellar note, watching Jack deal with his father and try to find Charlie and Claire. His desperate but successful attempt to revive Charlie remains a subject of debate, but the emotions are so raw it works as a part of Jack’s redemption.

#22. Angel “Smile Time” (Original Airdate: February 18, 2004)
Spike: Look at you.
Angel: Spike.
Spike: You're a--
Angel: Just turn around and walk away.
Spike: You're a bloody puppet!
Need I say more?

#21. 24 “Day 3: 5:00 AM – 6:00 AM” (Original Airdate: April 6, 2004) – Things got scary in this episode, as people in the hotel started to fall victim to the virus. Gael’s emotional goodbye and refusal to commit suicide was a great moment of characterization and helped avoid an easy way out from showing this suffering.

Tomorrow: Tom Cruise's crazy cousin, a joyride from hell courtesy of Wayne Brady and the longest run of Tony Soprano's life. Until then, the remote is yours.

Welcome, and The Top 40 Episodes of 2004, 40-31

Greetings,
This is my foray into blogging, so hopefully it's worth reading. I look forward to hearing your feedback. This blog will focus mostly on TV. So now I will bring you my top 40 episodes, part 1. Now sorry if a few shows like The Wire didn't make it, but I wasn't able to get into it to watch the season this year. I'll expect at least 1 other top 40 list. So without further ado, here are episodes #40-31:

#40. Six Feet Under “Falling Into Place” (Original Airdate: June 13, 2004) – The unbelievably bad fourth season of Six Feet Under started off well enough, with an emotional episode where Nate said goodbye to his wife and it seemed as if they were willing to let go. Unfortunately the rest of the show didn’t play out that way.

#39. CSI “Bloodlines” (Original Airdate: May 20, 2004) – CSI caught many fans off guard with an unusual twist from its somewhat formulaic (but entertaining) plot in its season finale, wherein a man had two pairs of DNA (one belonged to his brother who died early in pregnancy), one of which was found in several rape victims.

#38. The Simpsons “Marge vs. Singles, Seniors, Childless Couples and Teens, and Gays” (Original Airdate: January 4, 2004) – While the shine of the Simpsons has dulled a bit in recent seasons, this episode showed a glimmer of hope for one of the longest running shows in sitcom history. Homer’s PSA is the highlight.

#37. Entourage “The Script and the Sherpa” (Original Airdate: August 15, 2004) – Val Kilmer as a pot smoking Sherpa. What else could you ask for?

#36. Joan of Arcadia “Jump” (Original Airdate: January 9, 2004) – A tragic loss of a dying child is the start of this milestone. A really touching episode that proves you because you don’t drop the F-bomb on your show or have a lot of sex and violence doesn’t mean you can’t be good.

#35. Deadwood “Suffer The Little Children” (Original Airdate: May 9, 2004) – While Deadwood was mostly another overrated HBO show, it hit gold with this chilling hour, culminating with the murder of two teenage hustlers. Both were beaten and shot at close range. Even in the frontier the young don’t stand much of a chance against the rampant corruption and violence.

#34. Six Feet Under “In Case of Rapture” (Original Airdate: June 20, 2004) – It’s nice to see Six Feet Under, a show that has taken itself far too seriously in recent years, go back and do some dark humor. Unfortunately the rest of the season didn’t try to be intentionally funny.

#33. Desperate Housewives “Pretty Little Picture” (Original Airdate: October 17, 2004) – If only for the quote of the year, “Rex cries after he ejaculates.”

#32. Nip/Tuck “Naomi Gaines" (Original Airdate: August 3, 2004) – The creepy first appearance of The Carver. Bobbi Broderick realizing how trivial her problem is. Revelations galore and some of amazing performances, especially from Famke Janssen as Ava, the scene stealing seductress.

#31. 24 “Day 3: 10:00 AM – 11:00 AM” (Original Airdate: May 11, 2004) – An episode that was made largely by the last 5 minutes, which contains some amazing stunt work, including a helicopter explosion done with two F-18s.

Tomorrow: Puppets, Joan Rivers and messed up animals. Until then, the remote is yours.